Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
