Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
