:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
