You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
