How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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