You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
