He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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