Can i not drive my cunt home
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
