Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
