Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
