Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
