i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
