I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
