I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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