your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
