my phone cant type all the emotion im having
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
