Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
