Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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