Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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