i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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