Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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