What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Randomize
