i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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