Your mouth is God's brothel.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Randomize