THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
you never un-have a 4some
I need water and some morals
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
