Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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