Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
