is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
