we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
