Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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