You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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