My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
