I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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