You're completely useless in the revolution.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
