I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
