I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Randomize
