READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
God, you're like boner-b-gone
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
