She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
