I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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