So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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