Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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