Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
foreskin is a definite game changer
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
