my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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