At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Dick very happy bro
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Randomize
