Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Randomize
