Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
