if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
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