When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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