I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
