i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I'm at about main and main street
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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